Always Learning
Lesson for this weekend:
OK, so it turns out that if a great big cockroach manages to get into your house and you want to, you know, kill it, and you whack it with something that flexes a little, something that’s not hard and brittle, like a rolled-up newspaper, what you get is a great big dead cockroach, usually on it’s back. Then you quickly cover it with a paper towel, pick it up and throw it in the trash.
But if you step on that great big cockroach — assuming you are fast enough to get it — what you end up with is a great big, disgusting splat! and a thick puddle of white and brown goo on the floor and no one in the house can suppress their gag reflex long enough to pick it up and dispose of it but somebody has to do it and you know it’s going to be you.
Oh, and the tacky pus-like mess is also on the bottom of your shoe, and you’ve got to do somethiong about that, too.
So a word to the wise: use the rolled-up newspaper.
January 29th, 2007 at 6:36 am
Ewww, not so nice breakfast reading. I may as well go back to the living room and turn on The View.
January 29th, 2007 at 7:09 am
Can I use the BB gun on the cockroach?
January 29th, 2007 at 10:58 am
Theresa – If you can stomach The View, you can clean up the cockroach.
GnightGirl – Read it again: Use the newspaper, not the gun!
January 29th, 2007 at 3:49 pm
Um, like, ew!
January 29th, 2007 at 5:22 pm
Yeppers. I learned that lesson with the palmetto bugs in FLA. Now that’s a lotta goo!
January 29th, 2007 at 6:11 pm
Can I use the F-word here? Well, just in case…I f*cking hate cockroaches!
January 30th, 2007 at 9:35 am
k, M and L – Extremely high “eeeww” factor here, it seems. And yes, you can say “fuck” here. You just aren’t allowed to use bad language.
January 30th, 2007 at 9:54 am
Sissy! Oh, well, though I was a pest exterminator and squashed many cockroaches, the big ones (American or Smokey Brown) always gave me the willies when I stepped on them! Or when they flew up in my face. Jeez, I’m glad I don’t do all that crazy shit anymore. Oh, I forgot; I was supposed to fucking talk nice, wasn’t I?
January 30th, 2007 at 11:59 am
Ron – Oh, Christ — they can fly up in your face?
January 30th, 2007 at 9:08 pm
Florida cockroaches are almost impossible to kill…. ugh! and they always fly right AT you! hate them
February 6th, 2007 at 2:42 am
The shoe is more effective.
February 11th, 2007 at 2:29 am
Wait, wait wait! I always thought that you weren’t supposed to STEP on them at all, because their little, fucking EGGS could get on your shoe then, causing you to track the little beasts EVERYWHERE you go in the rest of the house!? Is that, like, an urban myth that I fell for? At my old age? Dammit. Someone enlighten me please!
February 28th, 2007 at 8:00 pm
I wouldnl’t worry about eggs. Of course, if you didn’t STOMP hard enough, there might be a problem! (Sometimes they get up and start running again.) But I doubt it.