One day I will hit upon a traffic-generating scam that will make this blog the Most Popular Destination on the Web.
The revision99 Protest Song UnContest was not it, however. I am reviewing the entries this evening, and I have a few thoughts:
- Thank you, thank you, thank you to those who wrote lyrics and proposed song ideas. My creative days are long in the past, so I really need this stuff if I am going to maintain any sort of illusion of vitality.
- I will not name names at this time, because then everyone will know what a flop the UnContest was. Besides, you know who you are. If any of you “win,” – and this is a big if – I will request permission to identify you in this blog.
- Apparently, not many of you are very angry, and those who are, aren’t really angry, just a little annoyed. You have to stoke up a pretty heavy head of steam to actually want to write a protest song (or, apparently, even to say a protest sentence), and I guess I just didn’t piss off enough of you, enough.
- I thought my list of things to be angry about would get your creative juices flowing, and just in case, my reprint of the lyrics to “Eve of Destruction” should have made it obvious that there would be no reason for embarrassment, no matter what you wrote. But most of you who said anything, said you “didn’t know how” to write song lyrics, or that you “suck at” writing song lyrics. You should listen to “Achy Breaky Heart” a few times.
But, whatever. I warned you what the punishment would be if you didn’t cooperate on this: I will write a protest song myself. God knows I am angry enough. I will steal what I can from the songs and ideas you have sent me, mix in a little tambourine and acoustic guitar, and try to put them together into a rousing anthem for the New Revolution. When it’s finished I will record it and post it for you all to hear. Then you’ll be sorry. Get your picket signs ready.